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Archive for July, 2009

Two Movies I Am Scared Of

Posted by Mrityunjay on July 28, 2009

I am dead tired of two big budget movies of recent times. Yes, they came back some six months back but they continue to haunt me or should I say, chase me wherever I go? Imagine, you going in a bus or trying to watch a movie with your family members on cable and these two movies keep coming to you with alarming frequency. Okay, one was a blockbuster and perhaps the second biggest hit of Hindi Cinema (what has happened to people’s taste? Thinking…) and another one proved to be a dud at box office (yeppieeee!) but does that give them a right to torment me? Yeah, I am talking about ‘Ghajini’ and ‘Chandni Chowk to China’. During my last trip to Mumbai and home town, I had to suffer the ignominy of watching these two horror movies almost 5-6 times. Most of the Hindi movies are crap and those that are not, hardly make any noise (except in film festivals) at box office but these two are top rung craps (if there is any sobriquet like that!)

I admire Amir Khan’s marketing skills and innovative approach to promote his movies but are people so blind not to differentiate between what is quality and what is total Bull***t? Most of the times, hype and hoopla fail to justify their existence. It was a movie that had numerous loopholes and yet it broke all the collection records. How could we appreciate a movie that has been ripped so shamelessly from quality stuff like ‘Memento’? Throughout the movies, there was not a single instant when I could find any love spark in girl’s eyes for his hero. Movie shows her in a smart and helping avatar who lives in Mumbai but was she so dumb not to identify the top honcho of country’s leading Telecom Company?

The villain, well, he was the only respite in the entire movie. Come on, he made me laugh! At least, the villain (supposed to be!) tickled my funny bone with his hilarious ‘dadagiri’! Yawnnnn!! More than a dark character, he looked like a clown trying real hard to be scary. Yeah, he succeeded in scaring me from watching this movie ever again in my life! The only saving grace was A R Rahman. Man, he rocks! The only thing I was left with after watching the horror show is ‘Re, Kaun Si Movie Thi Yeh’ (Like the villain keeps saying, Re kaun tha, Pata karo 2 saal pehle humne kis kis ko thoka tha! – Arre Yaar, if not anyone else, tumne mujhe toh thok hi diya!)   

Coming to Chandni Chowk to China, do let me know if there is any option like giving a movie -5 stars! I was glad this movie bombed. After the stupidity shown by Akshay Kumar in Welcome, Singh is King blah blah, finally our rising star crashed to some hard hitting reality. He has always been an average actor but dude, how far can you push your luck? The story of the movie is totally crappy. Did they really think, we would accept whatever nonsense they dish out? Acting is pathetic, scenes totally unrealistic and dialogoues…ummm..as crude as it can get! Throughout the entire length of the movie, you will come across dialogues like ‘Mere ande pe kyu maar rahe ho? Bache ki jaan loge kya? Mere pichwaade ko apni dukaan samajh ke kyu thok raha hai?’ and yes, we are supposed to laugh on these creative dialogues! These movies literally come in my dreams and scare me to death. No pun intended!

Welcome to new age bollywood where we have learnt to copy scenes, blindly follow action stunts, show unrealistic perspective and no original creativity! I am so glad small budget movies have come to the forefront with no mega budget and superstars! They are the only respite we have! Long live bollywood! To finish with, isn’t it ironical the term ‘bollywood’ itself is copied/mimicked from Hollywood so the how the hell we could even think of having originality under its plagiarized shadow?!

: Image courtesy istockphoto.com

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Are Men Becoming Redundant?

Posted by Mrityunjay on July 24, 2009

stress_ball_cAre men redundant? Yes, that’s the noise being created by media people all across the world. The reason being; now it’s possible to create human sperms with the help of stem cells! Being a male, I feel slightly agitated. How could you even imagine a world without men? Men are not just for sexual escapades. They are necessity. The world has always remained divided about equality between two sexes. One accusation against men is that they have failed to evolve with time whereas women have managed to come across half way and improve their stature. This hype is propagated by so called female empowerment brigade.

Now, my question is whether men are deemed suitable for sex only? According to conventional wisdom, the main purpose of sex is procreation and any pleasure derived from the act is purely incidental. Is that so? Okay, let me take this bull by his horns.

Suppose an average couple is married for 30 years and has two kids. A normal couple has sex twice a week (notwithstanding high libido exhibited by people in Greece or France). On that account a couple has sex 104 times per year and approximately 3100 times in their entire married life. So out of this huge number, they managed to produce two kids while rest of the times, all they thought about is how not to allow that nasty sperm to raise its head. So, two successful attempts by the sperm and some failed attempts and rest of the times it’s all about sheer pleasure. Seeing from that perspective does this hype and hoopla about ‘men needed for procreation only’ really counts?

Coming to the other side of the argument, scientists failed to create any sperm from female stem cells. Then, it makes imperative for men to exist. I assume, in future, these brainy scientists will be able to make sperm from female stem cells then also one needs Y chromosome to have sons. Even if men are termed redundant in future, females will be able to produce daughters only! Even if you are a hard core feminist you would not feel very comfortable with a world full of daughters and total absence of sons!  

May be, women are again going to become dominant species and we will once again be faced with matriarchal society but can women themselves imagine life without males? It would be damn boring ladies. Think of it! For one, you will be devoid of pure pleasure of sex. Secondly, what about other pleasures you get out of the poor men? Where will you find sometimes pseudo, some other times genuine intellect, soothing words, comfort of his hug, his humor or absence of it, conversational skills, his eccentricities and his constant refusal to evolve? The most important thing females are going to miss is the constant battle between two sexes along with men’s eternal fascination for women! I agree, men and women are not on same wavelength when it comes to sex. For a female a male is much more than a sexual object whereas for a man I cannot claim the same. But that’s where fun is when you know he is trying his best to woo you! Indeed, Life would be pretty colorless without men! despite the anti-testosterone movement, lets keep men anyways!

: Image courtesy istockphoto.com

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Decriminalizing gay sex in India

Posted by Mrityunjay on July 15, 2009

INDIA-GAY/It’s literally a milestone in the history of India. Delhi high court has ruled on section 37 of the Indian Penal Code and decided to decriminalize homosexuality. No doubt, this ruling has brought relief and cheer to the gay community in India who are forced to hide in closet. I felt glad to see the open celebrations in big cities. At least, gays felt free enough to celebrate the judgment. However, everything is not final yet. Central government can still produce its own version of opinion in the Supreme Court and that can alter the scenario.

In the hindsight, the high court has ruled in favor of what is actually taking place in other parts of the world. Many countries have legalized gay union. Understandably, old generation and religious organizations are completely against it whereas new age youths are favoring the seemingly evolutionary phase. What’s my opinion?

Well, I am totally in favor of this. I will tell you why. Though, you can be certain of the fact that I don’t have any such inclination in my personal capacity. Girls make me happy and unlike other things in life, I am pretty certain about this fact. Gosh, I just sounded defensive! Never mind!

One of the most obvious benefits of gay marriage is control over world’s most vicious problem, i.e., overpopulation. It may sound funny but think about it. Especially in a country like India that suffers from population explosion and offering 16 percent of world’s population, this may turn out to be a boom.

I am seriously astonished at hullabaloo created by people in India citing degradation of our rich culture and tradition. Well, what are you talking about fanatics? Same-sex concept has not come out of blue in recent times. It is in practice since centuries. No need to look as far as ancient Greek civilization where homosexuality was highly respected. Try checking out our lovely Ajanta and Allora and several other places where one can clearly see the images of same sex and its widespread prevalence during ancient era.

Third reason for me is the concept of love. Love should be the most important concept in a marriage and when two consenting adults are game for it; religious fundamentalists don’t have any business interfering with their choice.

What’s the point of forcing a gay person to marry a female when it is obvious that he will keep looking for ‘opportunities’ and consequently won’t be able to remain loyal to his spouse. And we all know how important healthy sex is for a successful marriage. I seriously doubt whether a gay individual will be able to enjoy sex with opposite sex!

Finally, does it harm anyone? It’s strictly between two individual who are in love and enjoy each other’s company. We do not need to worry in any case. We are a country with over 1 billion population. As far as procreation is concerned 90 percent of population is all game for adding their bit in population explosion.

: Image courtesy blogs.reuters.com/india

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